You are here: Home / HPRC Blog
RSS Feed for Family & Relationships

HPRC Blog

Welcome to the HPRC Blog. We've got lots of information here, from quick tips to in-depth posts about detailed human performance optimization topics.

HPRC Fitness Arena: Family & Relationships

Small changes can pay off in a big way

HPRC Fitness Arena: Family & Relationships
Resolutions don't have to daunting—making small, not big, changes that fit easily into your lifestyle are good options for family health and weight loss over time.

It’s the New Year! If you’re already despairing about resolutions, keep in mind that making small changes in behavior that fit easily into your lifestyle are good options for family health and weight loss over time. For one month, try choosing three small habits to focus on changing that you can apply to any situation, whether you’re at home, overseas, or travelling. Try setting up email or calendar reminders if that helps you, or put up tangible reminders such as sticky notes around your house. To get you started, here are some ideas:

  • Keep unhealthy foods such as potato chips, cookies, etc. out of sight so they are less tempting.
  • Put down your fork and knife between bites.
  • Portion out “snackable” foods that come in large bags/containers into smaller one-serving containers, so you don’t keep dipping in.
  • Choose water over soda.
  • Keep fresh fruit on hand to replace fatty, high-calorie snacks.

For more help, Military OneSource has a Health and Wellness Coaching Program that can help you lose weight and improve your overall fitness. Finally, for more information on making healthy food choices for you and your family, visit HPRC’s Family Nutrition section.

Sleep needs for adults

Optimum performance requires optimum sleep as part of post-exercise recovery. A recent report shows that athletes—including warrior athletes—need extra.

According to a recent report about post-exercise recovery and regeneration for athletes, men over 19 and women over 18 needs 8-10 hours of sleep a night (plus a 30-minute afternoon nap, as needed) for optimal athletic performance.

Continuing good sleep habits established earlier in adolescence such as regular meals, early morning light exposure, and a nightly sleep routine remain important. However, it’s also important to monitor the effects of stress and changes in sleep due to training/military operations.

Even if you’re not an athlete, the recommendations above still apply, except that your total sleep needs are seven to nine hours a night to keep you at your best.

Some additional tips for sleep:

  • Regular exercise during the day can help you sleep better at night.
  • If you have a question about whether to exercise more or sleep, choose sleep!
  • During the night, if you wake up and after 20 minutes haven’t gone back to sleep, get out of bed, do something relaxing, and then get back in bed. You’ll probably fall right asleep.

Also, for a better understanding of your current sleep habits, afterdeployment.org has an online “sleep assessment” that you can take. For more information on how to optimize your sleep, visit the HPRC’s Sleep Optimization section.

Start your children’s good sleep habits early

Sleep is an essential part of post-exercise recovery, and good sleep habits begin in childhood. A recent Canadian report on bringing up children as athletes provides valuable input for children at various ages.

Do you know how much sleep you and your loved ones are getting—and supposed to be getting?  Keep in mind the recommendations differ by age group. According to a report from Canadian Sport for Life on optimal sleep for athletic performance at all life stages:

  • Children under the age of six need 13–16 hours of sleep daily, including longer nighttime sleep and fewer daytime naps as they get older.
  • As girls reach the ages of 6–8 and boys reach 6–9, their sleep needs drop to 10–11 hours of sleep a night.
  • Girls 8–11 and boys 9–12 need 9 ½ to 10 hours of sleep a night.
  • Girls 11–15 and boys 12–16 need around nine hours of sleep a night.
  • In addition to their nightly sleep, girls 6-15 and boys 6-16 need a 30-minute-plus nap between 2–4 pm every day.

For young children, meals—particularly breakfast—are an important part of establishing a reliable sleep routine, and as children age they should start developing a 15–30 minute routine before bedtime to get ready physically for sleep. This is also a great opportunity for some quality time between parents and children that you can all look forward to each night.

To make this goal easier, be sure your kids avoid computers and TVs (anything with electronic stimulation) for one to two hours before bedtime. Allow an hour to unwind before bed—try soothing music, reading, and dim lighting.

As children become teenagers, make sure they don’t start incurring a sleep debt by sleeping less than needed. Encourage them to keep regular sleep hours, get early morning light exposure, and carefully gauge their caffeine consumption close to bedtime.

The report mentioned above suggests using a sleep log (and provides a sample log) to get an idea of your and your child’s sleep patterns. Remember that the warrior athletes of tomorrow need to develop good sleep habits today!

Thankful for you?

A little appreciation can go a long way in keeping the relationship with your significant other at its best, especially when deployment means you are apart for a time.

Do you show your loved one appreciation? Gratitude is an essential element in happy relationships. Couples who feel appreciated by their significant others in turn are more appreciative back to the other person. Also, when shown appreciation, people tend to be more responsive to their significant other’s needs. In short, gratitude is contagious! Try it. When you next talk to your significant other, find something to be appreciative about and see if it has any positive ripple effects. This can also help maintain intimacy when you are apart from your loved one due to deployment or TDY.

For more ideas to enhance your relationship, check out the Performance Booster on Couples Communication and Relationship Enhancement section of the HPRC’s site.

Enjoying the ordinary

“Count your blessings” isn’t just a saying—it’s a good way to reduce stress and take your mind off the negatives in life. Take a look around for the things in your everyday life that you can be thankful for and take a moment to appreciate them.

Many of us have the habit of focusing on the negatives in life and expecting the worst outcome. This tendency can be compounded by military training that teaches you how to assess risks and plan for the worst outcome. If you tend to focus on the negatives in life, you’re shortchanging yourself. Try to appreciate the little things in your day that you may take for granted. Focus on appreciation and gratitude. Try breaking your habit of focusing on the negative for just one day; instead spend it acknowledging and appreciating the ordinary good things in your life.

  • When you wake up in the morning, stop and take a moment to say good morning to your day.
  • If you are in a relationship, take a few minutes to really look at and appreciate your significant other.
  • If you are deployed with your unit, pause to think about how your buddies support and help one another to get through a rough day.
  • Before you eat lunch, reflect for a moment and think about something that keeps you going everyday—maybe it’s as simple as the first cup of coffee in the morning, an easy commute, or your buddy’s positive attitude. Take a moment to be grateful for that.
  • At dinner, spend a moment thinking about your loved ones. Have you told them lately something you appreciate about them?
  • Finally, before you go to sleep, acknowledge something about yourself you’re proud of.

Start again tomorrow, reflecting back to today—did acknowledging the magic of the “everyday” help you have a better day?

For more information on mental strategies, visit HPRC’s Mind Tactics domain.

Predicting body weight from childhood to adulthood

Now you can calculate your child’s risk of becoming obese with a simple online calculator.

Preventing obesity should begin at an early age, because children who are overweight often become obese as adults. And while many of us know that we need to eat right and exercise, there are also risk factors that we are born with that we can’t change. Now you can calculate your child’s risk of developing obesity with an online calculator.

The calculator was developed by a team of researchers who looked at a number of well-known biological and social risk factors for developing obesity. They were able to boil down their findings to six simple factors that provide a reasonably accurate probability of whether a child will develop obesity:

1)    The body mass indexes (BMIs) of both parents. (HPRC has a link to a calculator you can use to calculate BMI.)

2)    The number of people who live in the house.

3)    What kind of work the child’s mother does.

4)    Whether the mother smoked during her pregnancy.

5)    The birth weight of the child (in kilograms). (To convert pounds [lb] to kilograms [kg], multiply pounds by 0.45359237.)

Living a healthy lifestyle is beneficial for everyone, but tools like this can help you determine whether your child is particularly at risk for becoming an obese adult, so that you can make important health changes early in life. For ideas to help your family be physically active and healthy, check out this HPRC Healthy Tip as well as the family physical fitness and family nutrition sections of HPRC’s website.

Don’t let anger control you

Mad at your spouse, your kids, a friend? It’s okay, but you also need to know how to manage that anger so it doesn’t damage your relationships.

Anger is a normal feeling. It’s also inevitable that the people you love will at some point make you angry. Instead of letting your anger control you, however, find out how to control your anger. Managing your anger is important for both yourself and your relationships. Afterdeployment.org has handouts with information on anger and anger management, common myths about anger, tips on how to use timeouts to manage anger, and how to create an “anger control plan.” For strategies on how to further enhance your relationships, visit HPRC’s Overall Family Optimization Skills section.

Relaxation drinks: Problematic for teens?

Are relaxation drinks safe for children and adolescents? Recent reports highlight possible problems.

A number of relaxation beverages have been introduced into the market and are now available to consumers of any age from convenience stores, college campuses, and online vendors. There are recent reports of negative side effects in children and teens from the consumption of these drinks. There are two significant issues with relaxation drinks: First, some of their ingredients, particularly melatonin, have not gone through the Food and Drug Administration’s (FDA) process required for all food ingredients to be designated as safe or “generally recognized as safe” (GRAS). Second, other ingredients such as valerian and caffeine do not have established serving sizes or doses for this type of use. An additional concern is that it is unknown how ingredients might interact. Parents should be concerned about this.

It also may be hard to tell the difference between these drinks and those that have been recognized as safe because their bottles and labels are sometimes similar. A typical consumer may not realize which drinks contain ingredients that might have negative effects. Therefore it’s important to be aware what is in these drinks and to read all labels carefully. Many of these drinks have warnings on their labels that they are not intended for children. For more information about relaxation drinks, their ingredients, and their effects, check out HPRC’s article. Also, visit OPSS (Operation Supplement Safety) for more information about dietary supplement safety and specific ingredients.

Remember, there’s no magic beverage for relaxing or reducing stress. Instead, address those issues in order to get to the bottom of the stress you or your teen might be experiencing. There are strategies that you or your child can use to relax and de-stress in a healthy way. For even more ideas, visit the stress control section of HPRC’s website.

Are you friends with your significant other?

Couples who are also friends with one another are usually happier and healthier, making friendship with your significant other an important part of a Warfighter’s fitness.

Love may be the most important part of choosing a partner—but do you also think about friendship? Couples who both love AND cultivate a friendship with each other have happier and more stable relationships over the long run—and people in happier relationships tend to be healthier. That makes friendship with your significant other one more factor in a Warfighter’s total fitness package.

If you’re wondering how to cultivate a friendship with your partner, try starting up a conversation around topics like these that will bring you closer:

  • What is it about yourself that you’re most proud of?
  • What would you like to see happen for us in the next five years?
  • Who are your best friends at this point in your life?
  • What attracted you to me when we first met?

In other words, you can build a friendship together by talking about your experiences, wants, and dreams. For more tips on building or maintaining a strong relationship, check out HPRC's Answer on how to optimize your relationships.

Tips for families separated during the holidays

Just a little effort can help keep the holiday spirit alive when a family member is away on deployment.

The holidays can be hard for families when a loved one is deployed. This blog entry from the Defense Centers of Excellence, “Preparing Your Family for the Holidays Apart,” has some tips for the holidays for the family at home, including:

  • Continue gift exchanges even if family members are apart, as traditions are important.
  • Socialize with your friends and family as usual; don’t isolate yourself.

Family members can even get creative with holiday traditions, such as making holiday ornaments with names of loved ones and/or writing letters to be opened during the holiday season.

RSS Feed for Family & Relationships