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HPRC Fitness Arena: Family & Relationships

Are you friends with your significant other?

Couples who are also friends with one another are usually happier and healthier, making friendship with your significant other an important part of a Warfighter’s fitness.

Love may be the most important part of choosing a partner—but do you also think about friendship? Couples who both love AND cultivate a friendship with each other have happier and more stable relationships over the long run—and people in happier relationships tend to be healthier. That makes friendship with your significant other one more factor in a Warfighter’s total fitness package.

If you’re wondering how to cultivate a friendship with your partner, try starting up a conversation around topics like these that will bring you closer:

  • What is it about yourself that you’re most proud of?
  • What would you like to see happen for us in the next five years?
  • Who are your best friends at this point in your life?
  • What attracted you to me when we first met?

In other words, you can build a friendship together by talking about your experiences, wants, and dreams. For more tips on building or maintaining a strong relationship, check out HPRC's Answer on how to optimize your relationships.

Tips for families separated during the holidays

Just a little effort can help keep the holiday spirit alive when a family member is away on deployment.

The holidays can be hard for families when a loved one is deployed. This blog entry from the Defense Centers of Excellence, “Preparing Your Family for the Holidays Apart,” has some tips for the holidays for the family at home, including:

  • Continue gift exchanges even if family members are apart, as traditions are important.
  • Socialize with your friends and family as usual; don’t isolate yourself.

Family members can even get creative with holiday traditions, such as making holiday ornaments with names of loved ones and/or writing letters to be opened during the holiday season.

Be mindful during the holidays

Stressed out by the holidays? A bit of mindfulness can help.

The holidays can sometimes be a stressful time filled with loved ones and activities. This year, try practicing one of the healthy stress busters you can find on HPRC’s website—by yourself or with your family. For example, give brief meditation a try.

You can even try this as a family: Have someone lead the meditation and give occasional cues. Note that this generally works better with older children!

For more information on strategies for stress, visit the Stress Control section in HPRC’s Mind Tactics domain.

Does your child lose sleep over worries?

School age children are often burdened with a lot of worries; more so if if one parent is deployed. Here's a simple strategy to help worrying minds.

Not being able to quiet your mind at night can be very frustrating— and it’s not just an “adult” problem. If your child has difficulty sleeping because of a restless mind, try setting aside some “worry time” during the day. Help your child create a “worry box” and personalize it through art. Children can write down their worries—each on a separate index card—and deposit the worry in the worry box. Doing this while getting ready for bedtime can be a good way to spend some quality time with your child every night. For more information on sleep strategies, visit HPRC’s Mind Tactics section.

MHS highlights Total Force Fitness

July was the Military Health System’s “Total Fitness Month.” HPRC offers lots of resources to follow up on their recommendations for healthy living.

This past July, the Military Health System focused on promoting Total Force Fitness, giving priority to seven top areas: tobacco-free living, drug-abuse prevention, healthy eating, active living, injury-free and violence-free living, reproductive and sexual health, and mental and emotional well-being. They suggest managing your own health and wellness by making healthy choices between doctor’s visits. For inspirations and ideas that can help, check out HPRC’s ways to:

Operation Supplement Safety (OPSS) has now been launched to answer many of your questions about Dietary Supplements. Visit the OPSS section of HPRC’s website now to learn more!

Energy drinks and adolescents

Energy drink use by adolescents is on the rise, and misuse of these beverages may stem from confusion about using energy drinks for rehydration.

Energy drinks are marketed to improve physical and mental performance, mainly to “boost energy.” Adolescents are getting hold of energy drinks more often, in part due to heavy marketing of sports drinks with athletic superstars, causing adolescents to confuse energy drinks for sports drinks. Energy drinks contain large amounts of caffeine and other stimulants, while sports drinks contain carbohydrates and electrolytes and are intended for use when athletes (including adolescents) are engaged in prolonged, vigorous exercise. Adolescents have already had problems combining energy drinks and alcohol, which has led to risky behavior. The American Academy of Pediatrics has guidelines for the use of energy drinks and sports drinks by adolescents.

Operation Supplement Safety (OPSS) has now been launched to answer many of your questions about Dietary Supplements. Visit the OPSS section of HPRC’s website now to learn more!

Don’t just listen – show you are listening.

Some tips for "active" and "constructive" listening will improve your communication skills.

Being able to communicate effectively with those around us is a great way not only to enhance our relationships but also to ward off unnecessary stress. When having a conversation with a partner, friend, or coworker, most of us forget to communicate that we’re listening and that we understand what the other person is saying, which, can lead to arguments and/or misunderstandings. Show the other person that you’re genuinely interested in what they have to say— asking questions and showing supportive reactions will help the other person feel understood. The Kansas National Guard has a video that demonstrates four ways of responding, including one that is both active and constructive (the best way!).

How are you at handling criticism?

Maybe you can dish it out, but can you take it?

You’ve heard the expression about being able to dish it out, but not being able to take it. Is there some truth to that? Being on the receiving end of criticism can be difficult, especially in a close relationship, and can provoke anger. If you think that avoiding, denying, making excuses, or fighting back are the best ways to handle criticism, take note of how many times those tactics have made it worse instead. The next time you feel criticized, try this: Listen to what is being said, ask for details, agree with your critic’s right to his or her opinion, and use the criticism as a learning opportunity. If you need time to think about what they are saying or to calm down, saying “Let me think about it” might be a good way to get some space.

Activities help kids during times of deployment

Children feel lots of different things while their parent is deployed. There are organizations that can help kids through physical activity, peer mentoring, and other social gatherings.

Having something to keep children’s minds and bodies busy can make time pass faster and give them a sense of pride while their mom or dad is away. There are various organizations to help support children of deployed parents and keep them active and involved in their community. The U.S. Army has Operation Military Kid, which connects families to local resources to achieve a sense of community. Our Military Kids specifically reaches out to dependents of the National Guard, reservists, and active-duty wounded warriors. The Department of Defense has a new campaign, Operation Live Well, which includes resources to keep military children active and resilient during their guardian’s deployments. There are also numerous non-profit organizations that offer programming for military children—check out the National Resource Directory section for children’s programs near you.

Still too fat to fight

Retired military leaders are taking a stand against childhood obesity as a matter of national security and military readiness.

In the war against childhood obesity, senior military leaders are taking a stand in the name of national security. The retired generals and admirals of “Mission: Readiness” are doing their part to combat childhood obesity by calling on Congress to remove junk food and high-calorie drinks from schools by adopting the Institute of Medicine standards for what can be served in schools, increasing funding for more nutritious meals, and supporting the development of public health interventions. The group is concerned that current school policies and lack of high nutritional standards are leading to unhealthy food choices in the form of vending machine snacks and sugary drinks. As much as 40% of children’s caloric intake occurs at school, so clearly schools have an important role to play. Retired U.S. Army General Johnnie E. Wilson points out that “We need America’s service members to be in excellent physical condition because they have such an important job to do.” The most recent report by the Mission: Readiness organization estimates that 27% of young Americans are still too fat to fight and not healthy enough to serve their country. In an analysis of military standards, being overweight was the leading medical reason for being rejected from the military between 1995 and 2008. While these military leaders may be fighting for your kids, the real battle begins at home. Encourage healthy eating and lifestyle behaviors by staying fit as a family.

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