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Think like a survivor, not like a victim

Some individuals who have devastating injuries or illnesses are able to enjoy a good quality of life. Learn some factors that can help you think like a survivor, not a victim.

Why do some people with devastating injuries do well in their recoveries and others do not? People often focus on the negative fallout, but there can be positive consequences called post-traumatic growth. Scientists use the term “disability paradox” to refer to how some people with devastating illness or injuries are still able to enjoy a good quality of life. The characteristics of these folks describe someone with a “survivor mentality.” Characteristics include:

  • Subscribing meaning to one’s disability or lot in life and sharing this meaning with others.
  • Not choosing to live as a victim but instead to feel empowered and motivated to deal with struggles and come out as a victor.
  • Being flexible, adaptable, resilient, and rolling with the punches.

Many factors play into developing a survivor mentality. Here are some tips to help:

  • Create a strong support system: family, church, community, fellow Warfighters, healthcare providers, etc. A support system should be just that—supportive, encouraging, and a promoter of independence, not an enabler for being or feeling like a victim.
  • Maintain a “can do” attitude. See challenges or setbacks as an opportunity to learn and grow. Focus on strengths and abilities, not on limitations. Survivors exhibit the 4 Cs of mental toughness.
  • Maintain hope and optimism; focus on the future and move from thinking about the negative aspects of injury/illness to focusing on the positives or possibilities.  

Tips for combating loneliness

Feeling isolated or alone isn’t a recipe for resilience. Learn ways to overcome isolation.

There may be times in your life when you feel isolated or all alone. Connecting with people can help you find meaning in life, feel better, improve your mood, and beat boredom. Afterdeployment.org has a tip sheet—“Beating Isolation”—with ideas for how to overcome loneliness that include making plans to hang out with someone, reaching out to people you know, and getting involved in your community.

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