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While it’s true that sometimes the ones we love the most are the ones who can really get under our skin, particularly during the holidays when everyone’s together (know what your irritators are and how to deal with them), it’s also true that many of us have reason to celebrate our family and friends.
Appreciation is a powerful tool in fostering strong relationships, but it’s often overlooked in the business of everyday life. This holiday season take the time to let your family and friends know that you appreciate them. This can be in words or actions—it could be as simple as just taking the time to let them know you love and appreciate them, or you could show your appreciation with a gesture. For example, maybe your brother or best friend hasn’t had time for his favorite hobby lately due to family responsibilities. By offering to babysit the kids for an afternoon, you’d give him the chance to take time for himself. Small things go a long way in showing appreciation—this holiday season and all next year.
For more ideas on strengthening relationships, check out the Family Relationships section of HPRC’s website.
Last time we highlighted being aware of possible depression in those around you. This week, as we continue our series on keeping happy in the holidays, try practicing acceptance of the things you can’t control or avoid.
Problems can arise when you try to avoid thoughts or feelings rather than noticing them as they come and go. Instead of avoiding them, try to note your thoughts or feelings, accept them, and keep moving forward rather than dwelling on them. If you need or want to think about something further, pick a good time and place to think it through later. But if it’s outside your control, practicing acceptance can help separate the things you can control from those you can’t—and help you find some peace this holiday season.
Holiday parties provide opportunities to relax and enjoy good food and good times with family, friends, and colleagues. But they also can derail your weight and fitness goals. Buffet tables laden with calorie-rich treats and beverages can weaken the resolve of even the most committed folks. To keep yourself on track, remember these tips:
- Never go to a party hungry. Eat a protein-rich food before you go. Protein foods tell your brain that you’re satisfied and help you avoid overindulging. Low-fat milk or yogurt or a handful of nuts are great choices.
- Follow the MyPlate strategies for filling your party plate: Fill half your plate with fruits and vegetables then fill the rest with whole grains and lean protein such as fish or chicken.
- Choose wine over fancy mixed drinks or beer, and be sure to drink in moderation: one drink for women and two drinks for men. Sip slowly to make your drink last through the evening.
- If it’s a potluck, you really are in luck. Offer to bring a healthy salad or entrée, and fill your plate with your own delicious creation.
- Don’t waste your calories (and taste buds) on desserts that you don’t absolutely love. Choose your favorite and then share it with a friend. You’ll eat slower while you and your friend chat, and cherish the moment as much as the sweet!
Continuing HPRC’s series on keeping the happy in the holidays, last week we “focused on the positive.” This week, learn what the signs of depression are, and make sure you know how everyone in your family is doing.
Depression is not something that you can just snap out of. It can impact a person in many ways and can range from mild to severe. According to the American Psychological Association, “Depression is more than just sadness.” Symptoms can range from lack of interest to thoughts of suicide, so learn what to watch for. Check out this factsheet that details the signs and symptoms of depression and another on “Taking Charge of Depression” that includes helpful strategies. Depression is treatable with professional help; don’t isolate yourself and don’t let others do so.
For more information on depression, check out the suicide prevention section of HPRC’s website.
In HPRC’s series on how to keep the happy in the holidays, last week we discussed experimenting with expectations. This week we’re focusing on coping with loss. If you’ve recently lost a loved one or experiencing the anniversary of a loss, or if a loved one is far away—deployed, for example—then consider coping with loss or distance in a unique way this holiday season. Connect with your absent loved one in creative ways, maybe by looking at family photographs or spending time with your memories. If he or she is away on duty, schedule video or phone chats to open gifts while “together,” or figure out a way to have his or her presence felt during your normal holiday rituals and celebrations.
For more information on family resilience, check out the Family Resilience section of HPRC’s website.
Last week we focused on being a gratitude-seeker this holiday season. This week’s tip is to focus on the positive. Optimistic Warfighters who “see the glass half-full” are less impacted by warzone stress, experience fewer mental health issues, and exhibit better health and resilience overall. The Defense Centers of Excellence (DCoE) defines optimism as “a set of beliefs that helps to focus your attention and behavior on the opportunities and possibilities of life.” Everyone falls victim to negative or “the grass is greener” thinking at times, but negative thoughts create more negative thoughts. Learn to stay realistically positive. Optimistic thoughts are contagious too, so you’ll be passing on positivity! The Comprehensive Soldier & Family Fitness program calls focusing on the positive a “hunt for the good stuff.”
You can learn optimism in a variety of ways, such as focusing on what’s positive and possible, taking advantage of opportunities that arise, and developing realistic expectations about outcomes. DCoE has specific suggestions on how to accomplish realistic optimism. And for more Mind Tactics to promote resilience, check out HPRC’s Mental Resilience section.
In a 1960s TV cartoon series, George Jetson of The Jetsons simply popped a pill when he wanted to eat. “Dinner in a pill” was promised as the food of the future. So why hasn’t technology delivered on its promise? Simply put, no dietary supplement can reproduce the aromas, flavors, textures, or nutritional value of oven-roasted turkey, crusty, fresh-baked bread, juicy ripe pineapple, fragrant hot tea, or any other wholesome, delicious, performance-enhancing real food or beverage. And substituting dietary supplements for real food won’t help performance either – check out our video here. So skip supplements—not meals. To learn more about how real foods should come before dietary supplements, check out HPRC’s article in Operation Supplement Safety (OPSS).
The phrase “Garbage in, garbage out” was coined first by computer experts back in the 1960s. Since then, the phrase has gained a wider usage—even to the world of performance nutrition. Providing your body with high-quality fuels and nutrients is crucial to optimizing your performance. Like the poorly fueled runner in HPRC’s video, you’re likely to find that a diet of high-fat or sugary foods and drinks (“garbage in”) produces less than optimal results (“garbage out”). Instead, choose wholesome foods such as lean meats and fish, fresh fruits and vegetables, whole grains, and low-fat dairy products, which provide high-quality fuels and nutrients.
Check your money assumptions
Continuing our series on keeping the happy in the holidays this year, this week’s tip is to check your money assumptions. Finances can be strained during the holidays. This is not just an emotional problem, but how you think about money can affect you emotionally. Do you find yourself thinking, “I must give my family as good a Christmas as I had as a kid” or “I should be able to buy my kids whatever they want”? The fact is, you may like things to be different, but must or should they? Get rid of words such as “must” or “should” and focus instead on thoughts such as “What can I afford?” and “Are there ways I can make the holidays special without spending a lot of money?” Then notice how you feel without the constraints of what you must or should do. Instead, give yourself permission to give your family the holiday you can afford this year.
Happy Thanksgiving! In HPRC’s series on “Keeping the Happy in the Holidays,” this week we focus on being a gratitude-seeker. Gratitude is a state of mind that that can be hard to foster in our busy lives, particularly during the holidays. This holiday season set some time aside for gratitude.
The Defense Centers of Excellence suggests some tips for cultivating this skill, including:
• Spend two minutes a day thinking about what you are grateful for,
• Write five things daily in a gratitude journal
• Look for things to be grateful for in your everyday life.
For more ideas on fostering happiness, check out HPRC’s section on Mental Resilience.