Resilience is your ability to overcome and grow from tough situations. As a Service Member, you face challenges often, and being resilient during those times can improve your health across multiple Total Force Fitness domains.
- Social fitness. Those who show resilience report feelings of belongingness, and they notice social support from relationships, trust others more, and are more likely to engage in collaborative problem-solving.
- Mental fitness. Resilient people experience less depression, anxiety, and distress. They also engage in better self-care, are more likely to use coping strategies, and have more confidence.
- Physical fitness. Resilient people have a lower risk of heart disease and obesity.
- Spiritual fitness. Those who show resilience have greater feelings of vitality or report feeling full of life!
Focusing on social fitness and having solid social connections can help you manage challenging situations, improve your health, and strengthen resilience. Follow HPRC’s 4 strategies to build resilience and be a supportive teammate, romantic partner, or friend.
Share information about yourself
A great way to build and maintain relationships is to share information about yourself that the other person doesn’t already know. It could be something basic or superficial, such as your favorite food, or more vulnerable, such as your biggest fears.
The type and amount of information you share generally happens gradually over time and might differ based on your relationship. For example, with someone you’re just getting to know, such as a first date or a new coworker, you might share more superficial details. But with someone you know pretty well, you might share a lot more because you feel comfortable with them.
If you’re looking to deepen your connection with someone, try to come up with more things to talk about. For example, if you only discuss work with a teammate, introduce hobbies, sports, music, and other topics. You also can try talking more deeply about a topic to boost your social connection. For instance, if you’re talking about your favorite food with a new romantic partner, share any special memories you associate with that food or why it’s important to you and your health. If you have kids, ask about their interests and activities—and let the conversation flow.
Build team cohesion
Team cohesion is all about the relationship between teammates. It’s defined as the shared bond that drives team members to act and work together, support each other, and sustain their commitment—to each other and the unit as a whole—to accomplish team missions. Teams high in cohesion have better unit performance and morale.
To intentionally boost your team’s cohesion, focus on your team’s social bonds. You can do so by trying the 3 team-building activities specifically targeting team cohesion in HPRC’s team-building resource guide. Feel free to also check out the other activities that address team trust, psychological safety, and other areas of teamwork.
Respond when your partner wants to connect
There will be times in your relationships when your partner, friend, or teammate will communicate they want to connect with you. Whether they want attention, affirmation, affection, or any other positive connection, your response is important. Often, bids for connection are quite subtle. For example, a simple smile or question like, “How was your day?” are common ways someone might try to connect. Each time partners respond to each others’ bids for connection, they build up an abundance of goodwill, which helps cushion the relationship during conflict and other challenging events. Think of it like adding funds to a bank account, which you might lean on during tough financial times.
To improve your ability to respond, try to be more direct. For instance, saying something like, “I’m making a bid for attention right now” or “So I can respond positively to you, can you make it clear what you’re asking for?” can help both you and your partner recognize each other’s needs. You also can use technology to take intentional steps to communicate. For example, texting your friend to ask if they want to play pickleball this weekend or emailing your partner while on deployment are ways to use your devices to make bids for connection.
Express gratitude
Gratitude is when you recognize the good you’ve received and show your appreciation. Expressing gratitude can strengthen relationships and resilience, as well as improve sleep, boost performance, increase overall happiness, and enhance your leadership skills.
There are many science-based ways to grow your gratitude. Try HPRC’s gratitude calendar to help make gratitude a daily practice. Or get involved in HPRC’s annual #GotMySix challenge by giving shout-outs to those who have had your back in big or small ways.
Learn more
Building and maintaining strong social connections is good for your health and resilience. For more strategies, visit the Social Fitness section on hprc-online.org.